Now that I am out of my cesar burger induced coma (I'm not even joking), I am ready to write another blog for y'all!
Tomorrow (or today, cause it is probably Friday by the time you are reading this) marks the last day of my maintenance/landscaping job! This means I no longer have to plan my day around washrooms. You see, the way maintenance works (weather permitting) is: we have a certain list for every day of the week - so every Monday we do the same houses, every Tuesday we do the same houses.. you get the picture. And Friday (the best day of the week) is for either helping the landscape crew or finishing any of the properties we weren't able to get to from Monday to Thursday. Now that you get that picture, back to the topic of washrooms... when I say I have to plan my day around washrooms, I mean that there are certain areas on these lists that have nice, clean bathrooms and other areas that I don't necessarily want to use the facilities in and so I have to make sure I only have to go to the bathroom in the good places.
So, the point of today's post is to entertain and educate readers about the triumphs and tragedies of public washroom use!
First off, I would like to say that McDonald's has both some of the best AND worst bathrooms. How a billion dollar company can be at both ends of the bathroom spectrum is beyond me. Also, one of the McDonald's ALWAYS has a male staff member cleaning the women's washroom. This is so inefficient, McDonald's! First of all, if he is in there cleaning and I wanna pee, he has to leave. There are a couple of minutes of his time wasted. Second, if I am already in there, he has to wait until I get out.. and any other female patron. More of his time wasted waiting. Just get a female for the female washroom and a male for the male washroom. Problem solved. I could probably write an entire post about McDonald's washrooms. Like how in Charleswood there are THREE stalls, ONE sink and TWO hand dryers all in the tiniest area possible. I can't even.
Everyone likes the automatic flush, the automatic sink and all those automatic things that are in bathrooms to make it more sanitary right? Well, I know I'm not alone when I say that I don't like when I shift my body a half a millimetre and the sensor thinks I'm done my biz and decides to flush mid pee. Thanks for the backsplash, Mr Toilet, now I'm going to go home and bathe for five hours. And unfortunately for everyone reading this... I have no tips on how to make this stop. In fact, these toilets are actually so confusing. One day it flushes mid-biz, one day it flushes when you're actually done, one day you have to press the little button cause nothing happens and then another day it just flushes ten times once you're already washing or drying your hands. What gives!?!
Privacy is not something one usually has while in a public washroom, am I right? So every once in a while, it's nice to see the single stall, or the 'one person washroom with the door that locks and it is nice and roomy in there'. My biggest fears while using this type of washroom include: someone trying the door cause they don't know I'm in there and ... the lock doesn't work. And second: I walk in on someone else. Honestly, every single time I go to open one of those doors, I cringe that I might be opening the door on someone .. or that while I'm in there someone might open the door on me.
This brings me to how unnerving it is to go into a stall that you heard the previous person do a double flush in. It brings on an array of questions: Is the toilet sketchy and I'm going to have to flush one square of toilet paper down 10 times before it goes? Is it going to smell horrendous when I get in there? Is the toilet going to be overflowing? Will there be any toilet paper left? WHY did they just double flush??? But at the same time, maybe they were just doing a courtesy flush and you should be happy. Always give the benefit of the doubt.
Perks of frequent public washroom use? I'll tell ya! You know how sometimes a stall won't lock cause the latch part won't slide into the locking part? You know what I mean.. Well, usually, if you take your foot and lift the door a bit it will slide right in!
If you have to go to the washroom when you are out and about and the only place you can stop at looks sketchy and dirty.. it probably is. I highly recommend NOT using a 7-11 washroom, cause I have used several this summer and they were all gross. From my experience, Co-Op and Husky gas stations are your best bet. My only advice is to follow your own instincts. And guys, you are so lucky you can pee anywhere you want.
Luckily, I never had to use a porta potty this summer, except at Country Fest but those ones are cleaned like 95 times a day. All I can say about porta potty's is: make sure there is toilet paper BEFORE you do your business; hover as much as you can; if you know you're going to be using a PP, bring your own hand sanitizer cause the one that is supplied always seems to be empty.
Honestly, I'm really sleepy and this whole thing just really had no flow to it so I'm going to end it there. I had more points, I'm sure, but ... it's time for sleep.
Post some comments if you've got some funny public washroom stories! And if you've made the cesar burgs please let me know how they tasted/turned out/if you liked them!!!