Judoooo CHOP

Okay, so I've told a few of you what my next blog is going to be about.. and this is not that blog. Cause I just finished watching the first Brazilian woman ever to win an individual medal at the summer Olympics and I feel like I need to just get something out in the open.

So. Sarah Whateverherlastnameis from Brazil (say it with me, BRAH-ZEEL) won gold in Judo against a girl from Bulgaria. That's all fine and dandy. I watched the 5 minute match because I have never ever seen judo (AKA judo chop) before and I figure I might as well watch it and learn. I learned three things: 1) You can't step out of bounds; 2) You don't have a chance to fix your hair, hence Bulgaria girl wearing the really awkward ponytail things that she was wearing and 3) if I wore a bath robe to a bar and found some drunk girl to fight.. I could be an Olympic judo chopper. Obviously I'm only part joking about the third thing I learned. Part joking because, seriously - how are they actually fighting in their bath robes? (I wonder if they are soft or scratchy?) You know how in boxing they come out in silky robes to Eye Of the Tiger and they do air punches and then their guy takes it off and they hop around and psych themselves up? Well, when the judo girls were waiting to go to the mat, they were wearing what appeared to be robes (and flood pants, ew). But the thing is .. they never took them off. That's what they fought in. And they had belts that they kept adjusting so it wouldn't open. What's the point of that? I don't really wanna be worried about my belt bursting open when I'm in the middle of giving some broad an arm bar or choke hold or some other weird wrestling/judo/karate/tae kwon do move (CLOTHESLINE!!). I think they should be wearing something a little more practical. And that's about it.

I was going to write how I don't like it that the networks always put in little segments of sad things in an athlete's life like Christine Sinclair's Portland coach winning nationals and passing away, or that Ryder cycling guy whose Dad showed up to a race. I was going to write how it's not fair that they put sad stuff in the Olympics but then I didn't really have a reason or anything else to say about it. I am just one of those people who tears up easily, okay. Jeez. I mean.... usually the sun's just in my eyes or I tend to get things in my eyes convenientlly when sad things are happening. So that's why I'm tearing up .. because my tears are protecting my eyeball and trying to get the foreign body out.

Furthermore, shout out to D Scott and the Canadian women's soccer team (#canWNT) on their big dub today against South Africa. 3-0 woot woot! The women play a huge game against Sweden this coming Tuesday. A win means a shot at the next round and a loss or tie (God forbid) means we have to cross our fingers that the other third place teams in the other groups really sucked and we get to advance. So if I have your phone number and I know you probably aren't watching the soccer game, expect a text from me Tuesday because the ladies need our support and you should be watching!! Plus I can't watch it cause I'll be at work and I'll need updates. And we should all pray to the soccer gods that Christine Sinclair scores more goals than Abby Wambach for the rest of their lives in international soccer (which will probably be until they are 100 years old because they are machines) and that she can catch up and pass Mia Hamm (this is the part where you bow to Mia Hamm, soccer goddess) in the all-time scoring record (then we bow to Sinclair). Unless you are American, in which case I totally respect you praying the opposite. KILL IT TUESDAY CANADA! WOOOOO!!!

But anyways. Seriously guys and gals, I LOVE the Olympics. I will likely gain approximately 10 pounds in the weeks that follow this post because in my spare time I'm just going to sit at the TV watching the Olympics and the Paralympics. I am also one of those people who cheers and yells at the television screen like I am actually at the event. Fortunately, I am not one of those people who yells at the movie or television "DON'T GO IN THERE" when someone is going to go in the room where the murderer is. Big difference. And I'm sure you all know one of these people. (My mom.)


Until next time, GO CANADA GO!

And stay tuned for my next blog on world famous Honey Boo Boo. Just kidding, I don't really know who she is except that her family doesn't agree whether they are rednecks or not. But I actually am writing about Toddlers & Tiaras soon. If it isn't up by Monday, be patient. You'll all love it just as much as the moms of this show love putting their 5 year old into a show girl outfit.

Love y'all.